Crusty Windows

Behold! XP Servis Pack 3, in a Windows 7 box!

The TeamOS computer. It knows if you seed after you download.

Crusty Windows (also called bootleg Windows), known as говносборки (lit. "shit builds") in Russian, are illegally modified builds of the Microsoft Windows operating system, typically developed by eccentric individuals who wish to see their favorite OS and franchises collide or just want to include every driver and program in existence in their OS installs. Many of these bootlegs are severely unstable, barely install at all, have nonsensical themes and wallpapers, have barely any effort put into them whatsoever, are hysterically poorly made, or are just simply impossible to find because nobody in their right mind downloaded them.

Crusty Windows come in a wide variety of languages, most commonly in English, Arabic, and Russian, and so far, at least one has been created in every continent (except Antarctica) - from the good ol' USA, to the exotic lands of the Great Wall, to the first traditional wonder of the ancient world, or even the land where maple syrup is consumed every day - there is always a Windows bootleg that represents someone out there.

While most bootlegs of Windows are free, a few cost money - for example, Lander X's bootlegs, and Radiant OS 11, which requires a TeamOS VIP subscription to download.

History

The Beginning

The BedOS 2.0 Desktop

The first bootleg that was created for Windows was a transformation pack called BedOS, released in early 2000. This OS required an existing install of Windows 95 or Windows 98 to function, and had releases in both Russian and English. It laid the foundations for many bootleg creators, as it added a custom theme, icons, and several additional drivers and programs, as well as removing some bloat from the existing install. It was a very important OS for kicking off the Russian bootleg scene and thus the Windows bootleg scene as a whole.

Several different versions of BedOS were released, including 2.0, 72214-1 (the first English version), and 3.0, themed after Mac OS X.

The name of the OS is a pun, as when romanized, the name would be "BadOS". It is also one of the very few bootlegs distributed as shareware.

The second earliest bootleg known to exist is one based on Windows XP before it was even released, known as Whistler Build 2531. Based on a Release Candidate 2 Build of XP, this bootleg also features many things seen commonly, such as additional backgrounds, registry tweaks, cracked activation, and more. Hilariously, this ISO seems to have been created out of spite towards the beta scene of the time, who were known for hoarding betas and being picky about quality.

nLite Era

nLite is a tool for customizing Windows 2000, Windows XP or Windows Server 2003 installation media. It can do a variety of things, like integrating updates (like DriverPacks, Kels' All-in-One CPL Bonus, VistaDriveIcon, Windows Media Player 11/Internet Explorer 8, and many more), unattended installs (used to pre-activate the OS, and change the registration information), integrating custom themes with the UXTheme patch, and even add in their own post-setup routines and drop custom files to certain locations (most notably, the Windows directory, and sometimes, Documents and Settings and other places), which is contained in the $OEM$ folder. Because of its extensive feature set and ease of use, lots of modders use it to create the finishing bits of their creation.

nLite was first released in 2004, although it did not gain much traction until around 2005, when some early XP bootlegs began to use the tool. Examples of mods using nLite around this time are Windows AlphaBetas (based on Windows 2000, nLite 1.0 beta 6 on Windows 2000), TinyXP (nLite 1.0 RC3 on Windows XP Professional SP2), Wesmosis (based on Windows XP, nLite, earliest releases go back to 2005) and Windows XP Gamer Edition (nLite 1.0 RC7, late 2006).

As the tool became easier to use and ISOs became easier to distribute thanks to the rise of file sharing websites like MegaUpload and Rapidshare, nLite would see an explosive spike in usage around early 2008, as dozens of authors began using it to create their own Windows mods and share it with their favorite forums or friends.

The latest version of this program is 1.4.9.3, and can still be downloaded today. It has not been updated for more than a decade, as the creator has switched to making a tool named NTLite, which has the same purpose, but supports Windows 7, 8.x, 10 and 11.

Despite not being updated for more than 10 years, nLite has continued to be the most popular program for making Windows XP bootlegs. Even after support for Windows XP had ended, people still continue to mod Windows XP to this day.

vLite Era

vLite is a tool for customizing Windows Vista installations. vLite is similar to its predecessor, nLite. As with nLite, vLite's capabilities were used by many modders to finish off their bootleg. The earliest examples of vLite being used go back to TinyVista (vLite 1.2 beta on Windows Vista SP1) and Windows Vista Lite (vLite 1.1.6 on Windows XP SP3). There are also bootlegs like Windows Vista Kagome Titanium SP2 Edition (vLite 1.2 on Windows Vista Ultimate SP2) and Windows Vista Alienware 2010.

vLite was used on most Windows Vista bootlegs. It was also used on Windows 7 RTM bootlegs, such as Tiny7 (vLite 1.2 on Windows 7 RTM) and Windows 7 Apple Logo (ditto). vLite did not get many updates and was much more shortlived than its predecessor, nLite. The next iteration of the software would be NTLite.

Despite the harsh criticism of Windows Vista, modifications of Vista were still made. As with Windows XP, Vista bootlegs are still being made today, but they are much more rare and much, much less interesting and more questionable.